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Hawthorn Inn (The Catalyst #1), by Heidi Willard
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Jack Erikson doesn't have great expectations when his mother moves them to an old decrepit inn in a town just as musty, but he's unprepared for the oddities that start springing out of the rotten woodwork. New friends introduce him to legends and rumors that have swirled around the inn since time-immemorial, and he finds plenty of proof to believe them as strange noises and twisted shadows stalk the halls.
Worst of all, his estranged grandfather has invited himself to join them at the inn. Creepy doesn't begin to describe that black-cloaked gentleman with the pale skin and weird, ever-constant glasses. Old secrets, mysterious sealed-up rooms and creeping shadows abound as Jack tries to manage his new life at Hawthorn Inn.
Hawthorn Inn is the first in a five novel horror/supernatural thriller series featuring Jack Erikson, a normal teenager with not-so-normal secrets.
- Published on: 2013-02-27
- Released on: 2013-02-27
- Format: Kindle eBook
From the Author
Read the first book and wanting a sneak peek at the second? Feel free to head on over to my site and download the first two chapters for free!
heidiwillard.com/books/catalyst-series/sanctuary/
About the Author
I admit it, my first efforts at writing were for fanfiction stories. Those halcyon days of flame reviews and poor grammar hardened my resolve to learn the art of writing because I knew I wanted to entertain people with my stories. So I climbed into a thesaurus and dictionary, and came out with a new respect for word usage and more distaste for the inconsistent rules of the English language.
Armed with my trust keyboard and backed up by my spell-checker I marched into the ranks of the self-published authors. Here I aim to stay (mostly because I don't have any other job), and here I aim to please those readers who like a good epic fantasy filled with humor and adventure.
Most helpful customer reviews
31 of 34 people found the following review helpful.
Kids swear constantly, Mother swears, and the Editor was apparently drunk...
By JulieAnnTheArtist
The book had potential. Hey! The cover was great! But whether it was the absolutely awful editing or perhaps English wasn't the authors first language (?), the language was stiff and unrealistic. I wish those things had been better, otherwise the story was one with potential. Still, I got the feeling that this book should have included more of the storyline and would have been better if the second book had been part of the first. It was worth reading because it was free. But at $4.99 each for the next four out of the full five books in the series, I think paying a total of $20.00 for the grammar errors and the hideous editing (actually omitted words, misspelled others, and the punctuation was terrible), is too much to ask. Re-editing and rethinking the stilted language would certainly make the book easier to survive. I think this could have been structured much better.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
DO NOT BOTHER
By Mandy Walkden-Brown (QLD, AUS)
I didn't find an a error until two thirds of the way through chapter two. I don't understand why editing was perfect until then and then it was completely absent. Did a draft get published by mistake?
ERRORS
LOC:
235 disappoint(ment)
262 attention to (the) path
335 halt . The person (remove space)
369 He stepped forward (not H stepped ...
386 plenty (of) other tables
410 Emily looked ( at or to) Amanda to listen
557 Jack mentions a rodent. What rodent? Only a shadow was mentioned
609 where he had come (from).
639 meantime (one word)
656 ought to or oughtta ? (not outta )
677 past not passed
702 "K mom," ( K correct if texting not speaking, then it's OK)
709 Jack led the group passed through the front doors (delete passed & it should have been past anyway)
765 hoping for some(thing) more impressive
842 recovered ( from ) his scare ( not for )
900 past not passed
980 a couple (of) dozen people
1003 with a (frown) not frowned
1024 "K, mom," (OK)
1068 the kitchen. and (remove period)
1103 As they put on their coats and Emily mom opened (delete either Emily or mom)
1115 had ( broken ) apart (not broke)
1129 She gave wrapped her arms around his shoulders. (Well your guess is as good as mine for that one!)
1143 Dark Ages (not dark ages)
1148 while ( not wile )
1161 A strong pair of arms slid beneath his limp body and slung one arm over a pair of firm shoulders. (One too many arms here - need to specify)
1177 soothe ( not sooth )
1207 "Let's see ( not "Le's see )
1209 which ( were ) now littered about
1214 and slurped down the ( dregs ) ( not dredges )
Some of these errors would be funny if they weren't so darn annoying
1241 groaning ( from ) down the hall,"
1242 peeked not peaked
1265 Why did the phone receiver suddenly become a mic?
1267 came the voice on the other line ( NO either: on the line or: on the other end of the line )
1267 Jackcould ( Jack could )
1269 when the other line (the other end of the line )
1276 which ( was ) nailed on the wall ( not were )
1280 the new arrangement ( was ) made ( not were )
1300 on purpose or ( by ) accident,
1306 reply . Jack (delete space after reply )
1312 didn't even have ( the right ) to tell him ( not have any ability to tell him )
1322 I do not ( intend ) for ( not intent )
1391 had ( entered ) the room ( not enter )
1395 and ( he ) quickly (not she )
1417 affirmed . He (delete space after affirmed )
1447 ( he ) impishly ( not his )
1464 think of(comma)" Jack admitted
1470 He wondered if(comma) when his mom ( or delete the other comma in the sentence )
1505 sounds ( tempting ), but ( not temping )
1541 take ( a while ) unless ( not awhile - that means a short time which is not correct in this context )
1582 The intervals stretched from days to sometimes a few weeks, but never longer than a fortnight. (now that just makes no sense at all. Several means more than two! )
1584 some ( kind ) of entry book ( not kinda Or: keep kinda and delete of )
1586 a couple ( of ) hundred
1615 Even the outside needed ( to be ) swept of cobwebs.
1625 They were a raw and pink from all the scrubbing ( delete a )
1645 made him to understand ( delete to )
1649 heavy ( and ) his ( not ad )
1650 jerked ( awake ) by ( not away )
1682 peace not piece
1724 "( How're ) you doing ( not how )
1750 "But ( you're ) able ( not you )
1770 and work . The ( delete space after work )
1771 jaywalkers and ( loiterers ) as they ( not loiters ) 1772 Merchan's ( Realty ). Trees ( not realty )
1778 friend ( agreed ), and ( not agree )
1785 floor ( shone ) beneath their ( not shown )
1788 two circular metal staircases ( do u mean spiral staircases? )
1838 to such ( refinement ) ( not refinery )
1879 how ( badly ) it flooded." ( not bad. A refined lady would never say bad! )
1895 past not passed
1924 spoon ( three ) red stains ( not through )
1937 the bed.. ( delete one of the .'s )
1964 A cemetery has been ( ?needed ) sooner than
1974 entrance.He ( insert space )
1990 Jack, struck dumbfounded by ( No. Either: Jack, struck dumb by Or: Jack was dumbfounded by )
1990 curiosity was ( peaked. ) ( not peeked )
2012 didn't like ( the ) fact that his ( not that )
2109 was ( slowly ) pulling ( not slowing )
2112 The two ( peeked ) their heads ( not peaked )
2234 followed his grandfather ( past ) the ( not passed )
2242 wafted ( past ) his nose. ( not passed )
2242 as the ( mouldering ) air was ( not moulding )
2243 stepped ( past ) him ( not passed )
2329 A cool hand ( brushed ) aside ( not brush )
2332 he blinked ( open ) his eyes ( not opened )
2364 He was too stubborn to have anyone conquer over him, ( Well, your guess may be better than mine )
2396 and he quickly stood to his feet. ( Is it just me or is this annoying? He's hardly going to stood to his hands. Doesn't make sense. He simply stood. Or: quickly got to his feet. Not the only time this silly term is used either. )
2433 Their shadows were ( docile ) and ( not darn domicile. Does this author have a nutter version of autocorrect?? )
2488 Ts they piled ( assume it should be They piled)
2564 Kyle greeted as his rallied his composure returned. (Hmm. Maybe: Kyle greeted (and ) as ( he ) rallied his composure returned. ( I think, perhaps? It's quite hard work interpreting this story as it progresses. )
2606 His mom would might not believe them at first ( delete either would or might )
2614 "Yeah, she'll believe us," Jack insisted. "Um, no, she's not," Kyle suggested ( no, she won't )
MY FAVOURITE and cringed at the lack of proper grammar and spelling errors. ( No, there's no error. I just thought it extremely ironic! ) 2752 ( The ) people flitted ( not there )
2772 "You took can take ( delete took )
2848 knickknacks and ( baubles ) while ( not bobbles )
2858 two hundredth and fiftieth ( No. two hundred and fiftieth )
2872 That included the gentleman on the stage with them, who kept his hands firmly inside his arms. (Hmm. I'm a nurse and have never yet seen a human being manage that trick thus far! ) I assume she means he kept his arms folded with his hands trapped beneath them. (He was avoiding clapping at the time )
2897 "Well, ( Jack and I ) worked ( not me and Jack - wrong on so many levels )
2952 his friend stood to his feet. ( here we go again. His friend stood or: he got to his feet )
2972 "This ( ought to or oughtta (if you absolutely have to)} be easy ( not outta - meaning out of )
3058 ( moldering ) air ( not molding )
3123 try to ( leave ) the way we got in?"
3129 It was something short and round, and metal reflected the light. ( No idea. Aren't told what it is in this book ( it's actually part of a book as it doesn't actually end in this portion )
3144 let out ( a ) great bellow ( not the )
3148 efforts ( lasted ) only ( not last )
3160 This one was a doozy. Author got the main character's name wrong. His mother no less was speaking at the time. James should be John (although he calls himself Jack ) His name first appears loc 350 as John
3231 still ( too ) jumbled ( not to )
3338 and ( he ) looked at the alarm ( alarm is right, author keeps calling Jack she instead of he. )
3346 greeted by several voices groaning ( no, not several, just two. Jack and Kyle makes two. Several is more than two. )
3364 and when they pulled ( away ) he forlornly
Hmm 111 errors. That's way too many. Obviously no final proof-read of the final draft was done. I don't understand why authors are in such a rush to publish that they are willing to foist error strewn stuff like this on we the tortured reader. I usually stop at 10% if the errors are so frequent that they destroy the flow of the story. For some reason I stuck with this one in the hope that it would improve. It didn't. Nor did the story actually finish. A book is supposed to have a beginning, middle and end. This one, not so much. In fact this part of a book was the beginning and I'm not going to be forced into buying books two & three or however many there may be. Don't like this type of switch and bait marketing by authors. Much happier to pay more for what is an actual book. I don't see any paper books trying this technique. They wouldn't get away with it. The poor book seller would be pelted with the object of our frustration. Ouch!
So, the stars. 2 as it stands. Too many errors. Too little story completion. Too little too late.
Do not recommend until the errors have been removed. There may well have been more than the 111 that I noted. I wasn't actually looking for them, they just kept interrupting me.
Also should be marketed as Part One of a book, not masquerading as a whole tome.
There are a couple of good one-liners in there, but would improve with more of that quirky humour for example: when the little old lady falls to the ground avoiding a large black vehicle there is the following:
Her name was Gertrude Grover, lately of the ground and now in a foul mood.
I was hoping for more of this but it didn't happen. More of the interaction between the two old ladies, but it didn't happen. Yet, anyway.
Disappointing would me my summation. Promise did not come to fruition.
I am still shell-shocked by the number of errors as I gather this author has previously published. One would hope these offerings may have been edited a little better, commiserations if they weren't. I may still look at other books by this author, but not just yet, I'm still a little error shy.
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
This book should say PART ONE.
By jax
There are no answers for anything that happens. There are mysteries that aren't solved from the beginning like whose grandpa n y hasn't he been in there lives' but now he's there n y he so weird or what's in basement? Unless u want to read the series n want to spend $5 PER book without any answers then pass.
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